Cognitive skills and intelligence play a key role in developing activities; they are usually considered the “only” elements in accomplishing tasks. However, emotional intelligence is a differentiator for growth.
Emotional intelligence is manifested daily in how behavior is managed, mainly in interactions with others, collaborators, colleagues; it is essential for successful decision making.
How many times have discussions or conflicts been generated due to not understanding what others feel?
Low emotional intelligence can become a problem, affecting relationships with employees, customers, and suppliers. This article will share some of the key signs of poor emotional intelligence.
Recommended Article: 10 Signs of Good Emotional Intelligence
10 SIGNS OF POOR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE
1. INABILITY TO CONTROL OWN EMOTIONS
The main sign that demonstrates a lack of emotional intelligence is linked to controlling one’s emotions.
Thus, a person who can maintain a balanced behavior despite being sad or angry, for example, is considered emotionally intelligent.
This is extremely important for everyone, but especially for leaders, who need to provide security and stability to their followers.
2. FEELING STRESSED EASILY
Everyone has felt stressed at least once in their life, as this is natural. However, those who have this state often have trouble dealing with their own emotions.
This happens because the excess of stimuli that reach the individual’s mind has nowhere to go, making him act untimely.
On the other hand, emotions are efficiently channeled when you have emotional intelligence, which avoids fury episodes.
3. NOT BEING ABLE TO HAVE EMPATHY FOR OTHERS
Empathy is the ability to imagine yourself in other people’s situations and thus act towards them more compassionately and respectfully.
Thus, those who cannot be empathetic demonstrate the absence of emotional intelligence, as they behave without considering that their actions could harm someone.
Having empathy when acting is extremely necessary to live in a community and strengthen relationships, whether personal or professional.
How to develop empathy? Learn all about it on this article.
4. IGNORE OR CRITICIZE OTHERS OPINIONS
Our limiting beliefs acquired over the years make us people closed to different opinions. But the truth is, we always come across them.
Ignoring and criticizing different opinions demonstrates a remarkable lack of emotional intelligence, that you are not prepared and open to varying points of view.
As much as you disagree, listen in essence and try to extract the most from the other’s point of view.
People with a lack of emotional intelligence see different opinions as a threat, usually due to problems not overcome in the past, which ends up making them closed people and limiting their knowledge.
Listening in essence and not just to respond is characteristic of people with emotional intelligence.
5. GETTING ANNOYED BY LITTLE THINGS
Another characteristic of people with a lack of emotional intelligence is irritability. These people tend to get irritated more efficiently and with small events.
These are reasons such as slow traffic, a bump in the street, spilling coffee on your shirt, etc., but they are enough to be irritated all day for these people. We talk more about this principle here.
6. HOLD RESENTMENT
Getting hurt when someone does something wrong to you is normal and part of human behavior. However, when these resentments are held for too long, it is a sign of something to be revised.
A person with emotional intelligence knows how to recognize that everyone is liable to make mistakes and that it is not worth keeping bad feelings inside.
Letting go of the hurts is a liberating measure that leads to a fantastic attitude: forgiveness.
7. NOT RECOGNIZING YOUR EMOTIONAL STIMULUS
Emotions are not born inside a person without any explanation, and each one of them has its origin. Those with advanced emotional intelligence can recognize these stimuli and thus use this information to their advantage.
Thus, an individual who knows that he feels anxious when being pressured, for example, will go to work to deliver his work projects in advance so that he has ample time to dedicate himself to them with ease.
8. YOU ARE AFRAID TO EXPRESS EMOTIONS
Feeling afraid to show what you’re feeling is terrible; after all, being emotionally intelligent has nothing to do with experiencing only positive emotions, such as joy, for example, because that would escape the ordinary conditions of human beings.
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize how you feel and decide how to act without becoming a hostage to your own emotions. So when you’re in control of yourself, there’s no reason to be afraid to show what you feel.
9. YOU ARE UNAWARE OF YOUR EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS
Individuals with high EQ are generally aware of their triggers, which are factors that can trigger particular emotions and lead to discomfort, irritability, or stress. On the contrary, people with low emotional intelligence do not identify their triggers, not predict their responses to specific circumstances.
10. YOU OFTEN FEEL MISUNDERSTOOD
When you don’t have emotional intelligence, it’s hard to understand how you come across others. You feel misunderstood because you don’t deliver your message so that people can understand.
Even with practice, emotionally intelligent people know they don’t communicate every idea perfectly.
They understand when people don’t know what they’re saying, adjust their approach, and redirect communication in a way that can be understood.
You can learn more about how to receive and give feedback in this article.
People with low emotional intelligence are not always aware of it. They see how multiple areas of their lives are not working as they would, but they cannot find the exact reason.
They believe it may be due to bad luck or that others have the problem; however, the cause is within themselves, in a part of their intelligence: that which makes us understand and manage our emotions correctly and we can see and hear those of others.
Reference and Further Reading
7 Clear Signs That Your Emotional Intelligence Is Lower Than it Should Be. The Muse.
7 Signs of Low Emotional Intelligence. Nick Wignall.
7 INDICATORS OF GOOD AND BAD SOCIAL SKILLS. ACETHEPRESENTATION.